When Real Tears Fall

Rex is a tough kid.  He rarely cries for pain or attention.  The most frequent tears we see are associated with anger and frustration and usually accompanied by vicious screams, kicks, pinches, bites, and hits.  We know his triggers for these episodes, things like being told no or sensory overload, but we cannot always prevent them.

And then, there are other tears.  They are not a daily occurrence and maybe not even a weekly one.  They come unexpectedly in peaceful moments.  Medical and developmental experts are telling us that these spontaneous, seemingly random tears are merely a symptom of Rex's behavioral diagnoses, but I could not disagree more. 

When the real tears are about to flow, Rex gets quiet and pensive.  I could tell a few weeks ago from his face that he was nearing such a moment and grabbed my camera to document it:

As usual, Rex tried to hold it together.  I have quite a few pictures of Rex at his orphanage with his mouth crunched tightly like this and now I know what this look means:

It didn't take long for the tears to start flowing:

And flowing.  No one can tell me that this isn't an expression of true sadness, grief and loss:

And flowing while he sat calmly and almost noiselessly:

And flowing some more:

Do you want to know what stops the real tears every single time?  Words like these, repeated over and over and accompanied by rocking hugs, "Rex, Mama and Daddy love you.  You are safe here.  You will always be in our family.  We will never leave you.  You are our wonderful son and we love you forever."  He listens attentively and the tears slowly subside.

And when it's over, he finds a little spot to collect himself:

These tears are real and they are a part of my son and his story.  They break my heart, but I am so thankful that I can be by his side to offer comfort and love when they flow.