IAC 205 Results

The following referrals were issued in IAC session 205 held on December 16, 2011:

1) French dossier from January 2010 referred a male child aged 8 years and 10 months

2) U.S. dossier from August 2010 referred a female child aged 1 year and 9 months with features in health status

3) Italian dossier from March 2011 referred sisters aged 6 years and 7 months and 8 years and 8 months

4) Italian dossier from October 2011 referred a male child aged 9 years and 3 months

5) Italian dossier from November 2011 referred a female child aged 9 years and 10 months

6) U.S. dossier from December 2011 referred three waiting children (#234 & #1246 & #1476) with profiles on the MOJ site

7) U.S. dossier from December 2011 referred a waiting child (#566) with a profile on the MOJ site

Parenting Perk #2

More unexpected surprises.

I just had to laugh when I walked into the laundry room yesterday and saw this box of mac'n cheese perched on the washer. I give you one guess which one of my children carried this item from the downstairs pantry to the upstairs laundry room and left it there precariously balanced.

And this one goes into the "What Happened There?" parenting files. My best guess is that the purple ball ended up on the ledge by my nephews' hands somehow. If not, my kids are developmentally way further along than anyone gives them credit.

Oh and if you're wondering what this stick with ribbons is by my front door: it's a Survaknica for the Bulgarian New Year's tradition of (spine) tapping. My Survaknica is very inferiorly decorated compared to the ones you can see here: http://www.pc-freak.net/blog/happy-new-2012-year-few-bulgarian-new-year-traditions-customs/.

Dewey's Pizza

This evening we introduced Rex to a favorite of ours: Dewey's Pizza. As always, we ordered a Green Lantern (red sauce, light mozzarella, pesto, artichokes, mushrooms, goat cheese, and minced garlic). We knew Rex liked pizza, but we could not have been prepared for his excitement over this culinary adventure. He ate almost three pieces of a 17 inch pizza and was just unstoppable.

Even when his mouth was still plenty full, he kept signing eat profusely (for him that is his right index finger tapped anywhere on his cheek). He was eager to make sure we knew he wanted more. Okay, okay, we get it, kid, you like the Green Lantern. Welcome to the club.

Rex Bites

We gave Rex a whole square of graham cracker for dessert this evening and to our great surprise, he actually took a completely unassisted bite and then took the rest of the cracker back out of his mouth. Of course, being the crazy parents we are, we commemorated the first bite in a picture and a follow-up shot.

I don't expect him to be quite so good with his bite-taking on a consistent basis yet, but again, it's progress and we're all about progress here.

Rex Sucks

I bet you never thought you'd read this title on our blog... no worries, it's all good.

Rex was born with a cleft lip and palate and, therefore, was unable to latch on to bottles and suck as an infant. He dropped in weight from the 50th percentile at birth to the second percentile at a few months old. Finally, a donation of a cleft nurser arrived at the orphanage and Rex was able to eat and gain weight... without sucking. Up until now, we believed that Rex had lost his reflex or even inclination to suck due these circumstances.

On Friday Rex got past the child locks on the kitchen cabinet and took out a big sippy cup with two handles and a spout that has continuous flow. It's the very same sippy cup that I bought for him in Armenia and that he refused to use because he wanted a bottle. He looked at it and then put the spout in his mouth. As soon as I saw his interest, I grabbed the cup, filled it with juice, and handed it back to him. Lo and behold, he put it back into his mouth and started milking the spout just like he had done with his bottle nipples. Not ideal, but I was happy for a start and ready to practice more with this cup.

By Saturday, Rex had learned to close his mouth around the spout and tip up the cup to initiate or increase flow, holding it all by himself. He was also, to our great surprise, sucking instead of milking the spout by gnawing on it. We heard loud and clear and strong suction noises. We hardly trusted our ears.

So, this morning Rex took his sippy cup to OT to show off his skills. Ms. Kristen confirmed that he was, in fact, sucking. He did the best ever getting a tight seal with his lips and having very little juice spill. And in the end, instead of just letting go of the cup, he turned it spout up and held it in his hands until someone could take it from him. With a bit more practice, I see a great improvement for Craig and me in keeping Rex hydrated, especially in the car or when we are out and about.

Hurray, Rex sucks!

He's Growing

Today we had a medical appointment for Rex and he was weighed and measured. It wasn't 100% accurate as he was in clothes and had his shoes on, but after taking off some weight and height to account for those, I would say he now weighs 33 pounds and is 34 inches tall. Yep, he is short and stout, just like the little teapot. By U.S. growth charts he is now in the 70th percentile for weight and below the third percentile for height. He has gained five pounds since coming home and grown just over an inch. Keep it up, little guy!

Emilia - Nine Weeks Home

Emilia has now been home with us for nine weeks and more and more it seems like she is carving out her place in our family. She is becoming constantly more interactive, now demanding attention and affection by climbing into our laps or holding on to our legs. She does not stay to the sidelines as much anymore, but instead often follows the flow of the day through the house: when I cook, she is in the kitchen, when Rex has his in-home therapy, she’s right there and wants to participate, etc.

Much to our surprise, we have learned that Emilia loves to be in the shower. For a while now, she couldn’t be deterred from climbing in with either of us if she had the chance, so instead of haggling with wet pajamas or blown up diapers, we now just take her in with us from the start. It amazes me that she loves the hot water raining down on her and shows no fear or distress. You can hear her giggles and squeals of delight all through the house. Baths are okay, too, for her, but showering is the bee’s knees.

Emilia still has not learned any English words, but she is babbling a lot and we are hearing new letter combinations. She watches our mouths when we speak and she pays great attention when we name objects for her. She’s also trying to imitate, so I am hopeful that a first English word will come soon. I really can’t wait.

Emilia is eating well now and accepts her recommended 800-900 calories almost every day. We think she’s finally got a little belly on her and looks and acts stronger. As long as her food is liquid or smoothly pureed, she does not reject any flavors. She even eats green beans, peas, and soy yogurt. She has been taking a prescription for acid reflux at night, but I don’t know if it helps her rest more peacefully. She still fusses/wakes/cries two or three times every night which is our biggest struggle. We move her around from her crib to our bed to the floor each night. The floor is her favorite place to sleep… the harder, the better.

While she’s still reluctant to learn from us as her parents, Emilia watches Rex very closely and has picked up on much of what he can do. She has figured out how to operate a number of toys and she’s right behind him when he climbs the stairs. It won’t be long and she will surpass him in abilities and skills. Things that took him weeks of countless repetitions to learn have come to her rather quickly just from observation. This makes me both sad and happy because I know how hard Rex has to work for every little accomplishment and because I am relieved for Emilia having an easier time.

I am happy to see our fearsome foursome find our footing and fall into a mostly comfortable routine. Now I just can’t wait for spring to get those kids into some outdoor fun.

"Charlotte"

Our agency just received the file of a so-sweet toddler girl who may or may not be from the same country as my little Emilia. "Charlotte" will be two years old in June. She has spina bifida and shows signs of hydrocephalus. She enjoys reaching and grabbing at hanging toys and interacting with adults. She laughs when tickled or teased by her caretakers. She can hold her head upright, but has some difficulty if she is on her stomach. She repeats sounds and words. A medical report is currently available. Please contact waitingchild@hopscotchadoptions.org for more information!

You can also see a photo of "Charlotte" on www.rainbowkids.com. Go and check out that sweet little face!

IAC 204 Results

The following referrals were issued in IAC Session 204 which was held on 12/09/11:

1) Spanish dossier from February 2009 referred a male child aged 1 year and 5 months

2) Italian dossier from February 2009 referred a female child aged 4 years and 10 months

3) German dossier from February 2009 referred a female child aged 2 years and 10 months with features in health status and a family history

4) French dossier from April 2009 referred sisters aged 4 years and 8 months and 3 years and 1 month

5) French dossier from June 2009 referred a male child aged 5 years and 2 months with a family history

6) Swedish dossier from August 2009 referred a female child aged 1 year and 8 months with features in health status and a family history

7) Canadian dossier from September 2009 referred a female child aged 2 years 11 months with a family history

8) German dossier from December 2009 referred a male child aged 2 years with features in health status and a family history

9) U.S. dossier from May 2010 referred a brother and sister aged 2 years and 3 years and 4 months with features in health status

10) U.S. dossier from October 2010 referred a female child aged 8 years and 4 months

11) Italian dossier from April 2011 referred a male child aged 2 years and 8 months with features in health status

12) Italian dossier from July 2011 referred a male child aged 7 years and 8 months with features in health status and a family history

Rex - Twenty-Three Weeks Home

Today marks twenty-three weeks home and twenty-five weeks out of the orphanage for Rex.

Rex has been quite motivated for fine motor activities these last two weeks, so we have been spending a lot of time with pegs and puzzles and blocks and play dough. I am most impressed that he can stack two to six pegs as long as an adult holds the bottom one. I am really excited to see him move forward in this area as there was great reluctance before. Rex can now stand on one leg without holding on and can move his step stool around to reach things he wants. He has learned to independently select toys from a toy basket or from around the room and brings them to us for play. And when I put his shoes on to go outside, he lifts up his feet to help me. Now that Rex has mastered the stairs in various ways, they have become his favorite place to play. Sometimes he just sits half way up with a toy and entertains himself for a good long while. I used to be afraid that he would fall, but it hasn’t happened yet. Instead I have seen him show off some impressive reflexes in catching himself if he loses his balance. So, I no longer worry much about a tumble down the stairs for Rex. Emilia, on the other hand, is a different story.

Minus the sticky food mouth,

isn't he starting to look so grown-up?

Our biggest concern as Rex’s parents continues to be his auto-aggression. For the most part I am not talking rages anymore, but even slaps to the face can eventually escalate that way if we don’t attend to him. It’s sad to say, but Rex had learned at the orphanage that this kind of behavior got him attention and even negative attention is better than none at all. It must have been very effective for him there because he still feels that it’s best or at least easiest to communicate some of his needs this way. We continue to work on this issue to decrease SIB and increase appropriate ways of communicating. I have learned from other families whose children share Rex’s chromosomal anomaly that our special kids usually have very sweet and loving personalities which we do see with Rex and which gives me hope that the aggression toward himself is an orphanage behavior that will subside in time.

Over the last few weeks Rex has become a much pickier eater. He still eats large portions when he likes a food, but it’s sometimes a guessing game what he would like. He might wolf down a salami sandwich or a bowl of oatmeal one day and reject them the next. It’s been quite challenging for me to have two to three food options ready for him throughout the day, but it’s also helped me introduce some new foods like cold cereal in milk, raisins, quiche (though he now refuses to eat scrambled or fried eggs), and meatballs. I am told that this pickiness is a developmental milestone and a phase that passes, so hopefully this won’t last too long.

I know I must sound like a broken record, but Rex with all of his challenges is a most wonderful child that we're so thankful to call our own.

Their Families Found Them

I don't know if you remember, but in November I advocated for seven waiting children on my blog in hopes that word of them would spread and they would be matched with their forever families. Two of these kids, Hope and Olivia, have now been found by their parents. Wonderful, wonderful news that make me very happy!

Now let's place Karson, Christian, Gavin, Mariah and Annalise, too. Please give these kids a chance. Hopscotch has lots of photos and videos of all of them. Contact waitingchild@hopscotchadoptions.org.

Bulgarian Christmas Party

I am almost exactly a month late in posting this, but still wanted to tell you about the wonderful Christmas party our family attended at the home of one of our local Bulgarian friends. As always, there was lots of food, some traditional craft activities for the children, and Santa even showed up. Most of the children are members of recently immigrated families and there were also two adoptees: a young woman in her mid 20s and Emilia.

Here are the kids singing a number of Bulgarian holiday songs to Santa:

As soon as the singing started, Emilia was drawn in and sat down to listen:
She did not want to go up to Santa to receive her gift, but she sure liked being in front of the tree by his feet and watch the happenings from there:
The party was a lot of fun and I hope that we will see some of these nice Bulgarian families at our adoptive families' reunion this summer in Ohio.

The Sibs Are Growing Closer

Emilia: How to best approach the object of my affection?

Rex: I think I am going to play dead just in case.

Emilia: Brother darling, here I come.

Rex: Eeeek, what is she doing?
Emilia: I love you so, so, so, so much.

Rex: Please get away!
Emilia: Isn't this nice?

Rex: I give up. Have it your way, sister.

IAC 203 Results

The following referrals were issued in IAC session 203 which was held on 12/2/11:

1) German dossier from December 2008 referred a male child aged 2 years and 7 months

2) Canadian dossier from January 2009 referred a female child aged 3 years and 4 months

3) German dossier from January 2009 referred a male child aged 3 years with features in health status

4) U.S. dossier from May 2009 referred a female child aged 1 year and 9 months with features in health status

5) U.S dossier from October 2009 referred a male child aged 1 year and 5 months with features in health status and family history

6) German dossier from December 2009 referred a female child aged 1 year and 4 months with features in health status

7) U.S. dossier from May 2010 referred two brothers aged 1 year and 10 month and 2 years and 8 months with a family history

8) French dossier from May 2010 referred a male child aged 5 years and 11 months with features in health status

9) Italian dossier from May 2010 referred a male child aged 4 years and 4 months with a family history

10) Italian dossier from May 2010 referred a male child aged 7 years and 7 months

11) U.S. dossier from January 2011 referred two brothers aged 4 years and 2 months and 6 years and 11 months with a family history

12) French dossier from March 2011 referred a brother and sister aged 7 years and 7 months and 6 years and 8 months

13) Italian dossier from June 2011 referred a waiting child (#1758) with a profile on the MOJ site

14) French dossier from August 2011 referred three brothers aged 5 years and 8 months, 7 years and 7 months, 4 years and 2 months

15) U.S. dossier from November 2011 referred a waiting child (#1046) with a profile on the MOJ site

16) Italian dossier from November 2011 referred a waiting child (#1006) with a profile on the MOJ site

Rex's Celebration?

We didn't really have a celebration for the six months family milestone today (though it has been emotional and I have shed some tears of joy and gratitude), but Rex decided he would celebrate in his own way.

As you know, Rex is basically non-verbal, but we are trying to give him options to communicate and have been focusing on ASL and (approximate) verbalizations. As part of his therapy, we are supposed to record once a day how many times in a 15 minute period Rex requests spontaneously by signing or verbalizing. Today, our wonderful helper Marie aka Ms. Rie did the counting while working with a musical toy. As you can see, Rex signed "more" and verbalized "mmm" many times. It was the largest number of requests we have ever seen him make in such a short time.

After she had left, Marie sent me this photo of her hand where she had tallied Rex's requests and said that looking at her hand made her smile. It makes me smile, too. And thank you, Marie, you are are blessing to our entire family and truly bring out the best in Rex.

Rex also spent a significant amount of time with me today working with pegs and the pegboard. For some reason, he was very motivated and interested in this fine motor task this afternoon. In the end, he was able to place one peg into another for the first time ever completely unassisted.

What a great way to celebrate, kiddo!

What Difference Does It Make?

Six months ago today, after a devastating 8 month wait, we were finally reunited with our little Rex in Yerevan. What we found that day broke our hearts: our child was sad, angry, lonely and had nearly given up on others and on the world. He had turned to auto-aggression and raging to express how he was feeling. He was bruised from his own fists and rashed from the heat. He was almost entirely unable to connect with people in any way. He was hanging on by a thread to keep the spark and spirit of humanity alive in himself before going empty.

So what difference do six months with loving and attentive parents in a peaceful home make? We now have an active, curious, loving toddler who is quite confident and brave. He still struggles with some of the effects of institutional life, but by anyone’s estimation, he is not the same child. He has made incredible progress and works hard every day to move forward despite a host of special needs. He has found ways to communicate, he has attached to us, and he loves to laugh and explore. His greatest pleasure in life is music, anything from classical to German children’s songs to rap. He also so enjoys back rubs and foot massages and has turned into a regular cuddle bug.

See for yourself: Before & After July 11, 2011 & January 11, 2012

The Heart Of The Matter

When we adopted Emilia, we knew that her primary physical special need was a congenital heart defect. This was a condition to which we had expressed openness in our paperwork and something she shares in common with her youngest cousin. Today we had our first appointment with cardiology at Cincinnati Children's and all went well. Emilia's VSD is very small and her EKG is normal. She shows no signs of heart failure or breathing problems. We were told repeatedly to treat her like a normal child with no restrictions and no medications and to return in six months for a check-up and echo under sedation. They just want to be sure they are not missing anything. Her prognosis is very good.

At today's appointment, Emilia was also weighed and measured. I had been anxious for this information because I wanted to know if removing dairy from her diet and providing her with healthy, nutrient-rich foods was making a difference. Emilia weighed in at 8.53 kg (18.8 lbs) which is up 13 ounces from her last weigh in with the feeding team on 12/20. This means in three weeks' time, Emilia has gained nearly a whole pound. She also measured 74.2 cm (29.2 in) which is up 1.3 cm from 72.9 at the International Adoption Center on 12/7. I am thrilled to see her make such progress. It's very rewarding for me as I am constantly contemplating her diet and trying to make it as delicious and nutritious as possible.

Emilia - Seven Weeks Home

Emilia has now been home with us for seven weeks. I can hardly believe it. Time is flying by.

The last two weeks have brought major dietary changes for Emilia has I have removed all dairy from her meals. She now eats larger portions and more calories overall. Most days she even hits the target 800-900 calories suggested by the feeding team. Her bowel movements have reduced to 1-2 per day and she does get enough liquid (even if she only drinks about 8 ounces) to have three or four full diapers per day. Her sleeping at night is improved. She is much calmer and quieter now. I imagine it’s because her tummy is not hurting. She’s also taking her prescription iron supplement every night. I can’t wait for her to be weighed which should be on Tuesday. Craig and I do both feel that’s she’s growing, including her hair. I had to cut her bangs this week which she did not like, but it turned out okay. The hair on the back of her head is quite long, but you could never tell because it’s so curly:

Emilia continues to be very reluctant to do any structured learning. She sits on my lap to look at books or flashcards now, but she outright refuses to experiment with crayons, blocks, play dough, etc. Don’t get me wrong, she is a busy little girl and exploring on her own from morning to night. She loves to push her cart through the house, plays her xylophone several times a day, manipulates any small object she can find in her hands, has fun with the bead maze, the tambourine, and the beach ball. She also loves to climb. Any object or person larger than herself is something she attempts to scale. And yes, she’s made it onto the kitchen table via her highchair already. She’s like a little monkey. She’s not too keen on imitating sounds from Craig and me, but she always imitates Rex’s noises, so we know she can do it and is just choosing to ignore her parents. She is keeping up her Bulgarian words and uses them, but hasn’t added any English ones yet.

Bonding has been going very well. Emilia makes wonderful eye contact and looks to us for comfort now when she is hurt or upset. She snuggles her head into our shoulders when we carry her and wraps her arms around us, too. She smiles at us when she sees us and is beginning to respond to her new name.

Rex and Emilia continue to grow more interactive. I don’t know why, but especially in the evenings when it’s bath time and we are all getting ready for bed, those two are having tons of fun. Rex runs around and acts silly and Emilia follows him and laughs at him. She loves to watch him and seems to think he’s the bee’s knees. Rex has gotten much better at sharing my time and attention with his sister, but he’s still very protective of his daddy. Fortunately, Emilia is very forgiving in this department yet. The kids still parallel play, sometimes with the same toy.

All in all, things are going well. I can look back even a month from now and feel so much better about where our family is mentally, physically and emotionally these days and how we are melding together.

H2O Here We Go

Tonight it finally happened, the magical moment we waited and worked for over more than five months. Our son who used to kick and scream bloody murder at bath time, who needed to be washed as quickly as possible with as little water as possible, who was too scared to even go near a neighbor’s kiddie pool last summer, who would not stick his hands under a faucet or into a water bucket, who clearly had severe sensory if not traumatic issues with water… SAT DOWN IN THE TUB AND PLAYED.

Of course, I cried. And I laughed. And, as always, my heart swelled with pride and joy over this child who is simply coming around to life in his own time and his own way. He amazes us every day.

"Mariah" - Will Someone Please Go For Her?!

I don't know why, but I feel strongly compelled to advocate for this little girl again. She is seven years old and lives in one of the two countries from which our kids came. She has spina bifida and is wheelchair-bound. She also is under the care of a nephrologist for some kidney problems. That said, Mariah is an absolutely gorgeous girl, vibrant and beautiful. She speaks two languages, one of them English. She is bright, charming, and kind. She enjoys school and eagerly completes her homework each day. Mariah has been living in a small, private orphanage with a great ratio of caregivers to children. This place is more like a home and Mariah would likely transition smoothly into a family and make a wonderful daughter. For more information, including video, contact info@hopscotchadoptions.org.

Everyone who comes to my blog for information about IAC meetings or because you are a regular follower, please spread the word about this special little girl. Post a link on your own blogs, tweet it, write it onto your Facebook walls. It will only take a minute. Let's find a family for Mariah.

IAC 202 Results

The following referrals were issued in IAC session 202 which was held on 11/25/11:

1) French dossier from January 2009 referred a female child aged 1 year and 10 months

2) Italian dossier from June 2009 referred a female child aged 7 years and 1 month

3) French dossier from October 2010 referred a female child aged 8 years and 10 months

4) Italian dossier from February 2011 referred a male child aged 3 years 8 months with features in health status

5) Italian dossier from August 2011 referred a waiting child (#1130) with a profile on the MOJ site

6) Italian dossier from November 2011 referred three waiting children (#1706, #1707, #1709) with profiles on the MOJ site

7) U.S. dossier from November 2011 referred four waiting children (#1142, #372, #493, #544) with profiles on the MOJ site

8) U.S. dossier from November 2011 referred a waiting child (#953 ) with a profile on the MOJ site

9) Swedish dossier from November 2011 referred a waiting child (#1371 ) with a profile on the MOJ site

Rex - Twenty-One Weeks Home

Today marks twenty-one weeks home and twenty-three weeks out of the orphanage for Rex and boy, has he made those last two weeks count.

After a developmental hiatus since about Thanksgiving, Rex started making new strides again right around Christmas. I already shared with you one of his biggest accomplishments which is that he can now climb down our 14 stairs unassisted. He also started standing in the bathtub with water in it (as opposed to standing in the dry tub while we washed him from a bucket) and now he is sitting down in the water, too. He does not yet stay seated for very long, but he tries again and again throughout his bath. When he does overcome his fears and sits, he has a huge look of pride and happiness on his face.

A few days ago we converted Rex’s crib into a toddler bed and he made the transition with no problems. He’s been sleeping very well through the night in his new set-up and he is also adjusting to lying down in his bed awake, having daddy read his bedtime story, then cuddling and falling asleep with daddy sitting beside him. Previously, he would fall asleep in our bed after hearing his story. We are just so impressed with Rex's ability to handle change these days. He really has come a long way in this area.

Rex is also making good improvements with turn-taking using a preferred toy or during a preferred activity, with holding our hands while we walk in public, and with letting us know when he is hungry. He is really taking to using the sign for eat now. We do still experience tantrums and incidents of auto-aggression, but Rex is much more easily redirected and calmed now. Sometimes he is even able to stop himself and find a better solution on his own or by reaching out to us. We know that he spent long periods of time at the orphanage raging and hurting himself with little or no intervention, so it’s a difficult habit to break.

I have been reading to Emilia and suddenly Rex has become a bit more interested in books beyond his beloved night-time story. They don’t hold his interest for more than three or four pages, but at least he is looking at the pages now and paying a bit of attention. He also can focus on two to three flashcards in a row when I show them to him. Again, I think this is something he sees his little sister do and he imitates. It might also be too early to declare, but we have heard a first complete and clear word from Rex twice now. And no, it’s no mama or daddy, it’s bubble. I am not holding my breath that he is really verbalizing purposefully, but just letting you know that as always, my little guy is trying hard.

Lastly, Rex appears to be in a growth spurt. He has outgrown several items of clothing lately and I have had to replace them with 3Ts. His feet even got too big for the shoes he’s worn since July and he's in a size 5 Pampers though it doesn't seem to handle his girth much better than the size 4. Rex is eating like a horse these days and is always interested when sister is having her meals, too.

Go Rex, you’re amazing!

Look Who's Walking Now

Down the stairs that is...

When we accepted Rex’s referral back in 2010, we did not know of many of his special needs as they were not yet diagnosed or even obvious. However, there were certain issues we were prepared to accept. For example, our IA doctor had told us that she wasn’t sure that Rex would ever sit, crawl, stand, or walk and that he might remain immobile. We decided we could handle it if this were to be true. When we picked up Rex in July 2011 he had just learned how to walk and since then has made many strides in his gross motor development. He rang 2011 out on a very high note by learning how to do this:

I am insanely proud and fiercely protective of this amazing son of mine who does everything in his own perfect time.