Circle Of Moms Contest

Some folks have asked me what happened with the COM contest for the 2012 Best Mom Adoption Blogs. I am not privy to all the details, but from what I have been able to gather here and there, I think this is what happened.

When the contest opened, any mom blogger writing about adoption could be nominated, either by others or by themselves. This, rightfully, led to blogs being entered that look at adoption from various angles, including birth mothers who relinquished, adult adoptees with difficult experiences, people seeking adoption reform, etc. Some of these blogs were even voted into the Top 25 which I thought was great. I went and checked a few of them out and found them to be informative and meaningful. However, other people apparently thought these adoption perspectives were not "positive and supportive" and should, therefore, be excluded from the contest. Under some pressure, COM began disqualifying and removing certain blogs which, in turn, led to an outcry from another side of the adoption triad.

In addition, a few of the top bloggers got caught up in the conflict, getting some nasty comments and emails from the most fervent supporters of various viewpoints. Instead of receiving kudos for their willingness to share their lives and knowledge publicly, these moms were now attacked. Of course, when you put yourself out there, you have to expect that some will disagree with what you say, but while I do believe firmly in freedom of speech, some ways are better than others in exercising that right.

Basically, it seems that COM stepped into a controversy they were not prepared to handle. I think they responded poorly by closing down the contest rather than allowing the voting to proceed to see which blogs, regardless of their angle on adoption, would make the Top 25. It is very sad to me that so many people want to exclude any of the valuable insights and experiences of anyone who has lived adoption. Instead, I wish people would seize on the opportunity to learn from this cornucopia of perspectives and be respectful of the fact one size does not fit all when it comes to a complex issue like adoption.

Rex - Thirty-Five Weeks Home

As of yesterday, Rex has been out of the orphanage for thirty-seven and home with us for thirty-five weeks. Sometimes the days get away from me and I don’t feel like I am taking proper note about my kids’ progress, so this could be a short entry.

Rex continues to be a good eater. He likes raw spinach leaves with a little feta and Italian dressing from our plates when we have a salad and he’s a big fan of daddy’s homemade fruit smoothies. However, he’s still staying away from other raw veggies and fruits. I am hoping local seasonal produce will win him over in a few months. I am keeping a running list of what he likes because it won’t be long before I will be packing him a lunch box.

Rex has been doing extremely well with all of his therapy. Some of his goals are already considered mastered: responding to his name, climbing ladders, sliding down the slide, hitting the tambourine when asked to do so, and responding properly to the command “give me.” I am so proud of this little guy. Rex only has four signs that he knows for sure right now (eat, swing, go, music), but boy, does he ever use them. He desires to communicate! We are working on introducing new signs like drink and light and continuing to practice finished, tickle, etc. We are working on waving hi and bye, too, and even though we still have to lift up his arm, he now moves his hand back and forth for it on his own.

Rex has very recently decided that ride on toys might be okay after all. He is experimenting with a rocking horse and also a little car that you sit on and then propel yourself forward by moving your feet along the ground, Fred Flintstone style. Rex is also trying very hard to feed himself and continues to be motivated to help with dressing and undressing.

It’s also been exciting for me to see Rex’s creative and problem-solving responses to everyday situations. One cold morning he stood by the deck door in nothing but a diaper and signed go. I told him he needed clothes and shoes first, so the next thing I knew, Rex brought me a nearby pair of Craig’s shoes, handed them to me and plopped down on my lap to have me put them on. While I was laughing at my funny, smart boy, I also realized that this response meant that he understood what I had said to him, that he knew what/where shoes are, and that he knew what needed to happen to put them on. Another day Rex found a big Rubbermaid tote we had just bought and decided it would make a fantastic step-stool (everything moonlights as a step-stool for him these days, including jars of baby food). The lid was not snapped on, but just put across the top, so when Rex tried to climb up, it slipped off. I thought this would be the end of the experiment, but Rex impressed me in that he retrieved the lid several times over, placed it back onto the top of the tub and tried to climb again. Unfortunately, he had the same results each time, so he eventually let it be which is also an intelligent reaction.

Overall, we are very happy with Rex’s progress. He works harder than most kids I know while maintaining a joyful, curious spirit with a zest for life.

Picture Of The Day

Rex's idea of spring planting:

Wonder if that toy cell phone will sprout...

Circle Of Moms Contest

As some of you may have noticed, my blog had been nominated to be in the Top 25 Adoption Blogs for 2012 in the Circle of Moms contest. Thank you all if you voted for me, your efforts are much appreciated. Unfortunately, I just got this email:

Hello,

After serious consideration, we have decided to cancel our Adoption Blogs by Moms – 2012 contest. Our Top 25 program is meant to celebrate, connect, and support mom bloggers. Following some feedback from participants in our 2011 contest, we decided to make this year's Top 25 more inclusive. In doing so, we unknowingly stepped into a very sensitive issue and debate, and we apologize to all the moms who have been offended, no matter what your position on adoption is. We're committed to finding a way to give all parties in the Adoption Triad a voice on Circle of Moms. If we run a Top 25 Adoption Blogs in the future, we'll consult with mom bloggers in each part of the Adoption Triad on how to create a supportive contest where all bloggers would feel welcome and respected by Circle of Moms and by all participants. We appreciate the time and energy every participant put into this contest during the past week, and we sincerely regret that we can't reward those efforts in the way we had planned to when we launched the contest.

We will be closing the contest at 3pm PST today and all blogs will be removed from the contest page.

Sincerely,
The Circle of Moms Team

Maybe we'll try again next year if COM can find the right balance to represent all angles of adoption.

She's Still Waiting

Could she be your daughter?

For details, please contact info@hopscotchadoptions.org.

Daddy's Not A Fashion Guru

On the weekends, sometimes daddy does the dressing around here. In a pinch, the results of such activity can look something like this:

I sure got a good laugh out of it when I came downstairs and saw Rex playing on the deck in this stylish get-up, flashlight included. Thanks, guys, for brightening my Sunday morning.

Easter 2012

Isn't this a gorgeous picture to represent the day?

It was taken yesterday at the zoo where we had a fun time with the kids as well as Craig's dad and his wife. The morning started quite chilly, but once the sun came out the temperatures went near 70F. This was the children's first ever visit to the zoo, so I think they were a bit overwhelmed taking it all in. Emilia didn't even seem to realize that the animals were real. But both kids held up well for a few hours which was great.

After lunch at our usual nap time with my synchronized sleepers.

Emilia snuggling with Grandpa.

Our first Easter Sunday as a family has been very low key. We didn't even dye any eggs because, let's be honest, who wants to eat a dozen hard-boiled eggs? Maybe next year if the kids can help. We are even foregoing our traditional ham and mashed potato dinner and having steak, baked potatoes and sweet potatoes off the grill instead. Craig is cooking as I type - hurray.

It's nearly impossible to get my two kiddos into the same picture, but here are a few shots I snapped this morning of them playing together:

I hope everyone is having a great day. Happy Easter!