Super Seven

A while ago we celebrated Rex's seventh birthday. 

Here's the recap in photos.

Rex's party tray to share at school -
homemade bacon and potato chip truffles included

Of course, he cared very little about the special treats
and just wanted his turkey sandwich for lunch

Party room all set up for us
at Rex's favorite indoor playground

Banana muffins, maple cupcakes
and double chocolate cupcakes

These homemade maple cupcakes were a hit
and gone by the end of the party
as were the chocolate ones

Cousins take flight

Sizing up the big slide

Big squishy hug from his mama
while everyone sang Happy Birthday

Telling us all the cupcakes were nonsense
and he wanted a sandwich

Some of the 37 guests
gathered around the table -
Rex was happy

Happy, happy birthday, Rex.

I can't believe you are seven.

Daddy and I are so proud of you

and love you forever.

You are full of laughter and love,

curiosity, adventure and mischief.

If you could, you'd live outside
where you feel free, energized and creative

or in our big bed

where you feel safe, comforted and adored for who you are.

You're the best little boy in the whole wide world

and we're so lucky you're ours.

Picture Of The Day

Emilia's independent work at school - she tries so hard:

Manic Monday

We've had a super busy weekend and, consequently, our house was a mess this Monday.  So, I got to work.

Between the time I get up around 6:30 and when the girls board the bus around 8:30, I usually play a little game with myself called, "How Much Can I Get Done?"  This refers to tasks not part of our regular morning routine.  Today I was especially motivated and got some extra jobs completed before the girls left for school;

*loaded and ran dishwasher
*stripped beds and started laundry
*put away clean laundry from yesterday
*cooked chicken for chicken salad
*did homework with Ella
*picked up downstairs
*answered emails

Then when I was home alone for the next four hours, I

*made 6 individual freezer pizzas for the kids
*finished preparing the chicken salad
*unloaded dishwasher
*folded laundry
*ran another load of laundry
*mopped kitchen and downstairs bathroom
*swept dining room and family room
*vacuumed all carpets
*called PCP for a physician's order
*cleaned girls bathroom
*emailed with Emilia's therapists at school about an emerging issue
*called my mom

I think my manic Monday will lead to a slightly more tranquil Tuesday.

The Lonely Road

A fellow adoptive mother of children with special needs, Adeye Salem of No Greater Joy Mom, posted this entry to her blog yesterday and I want to share it with you.

Why?

Because it hits home.  Because we, too, have experienced the silent hurt of social isolation that began and slowly expanded as we grew our family, accepting and loving children with significant special needs.

Because we, too, used to have a lively group of friends with whom we celebrated special occasions, vacationed, and maintained ongoing contact.  Because this group largely faded away when the going got tough.

Because it's easier to stay at home than to go out and yet we want to go out together as a family and so we do, no matter the challenges.  Because respite is a miracle and so hard to get.  Because there've been three date nights in almost five years.

Because our life is not as scary if you come inside as it may look from the outside. Because our kids and our family need a village.

I agree with Adeye completely.  The most challenging aspect of having a family that includes individuals with physical, developmental and emotional special needs has nothing to do with doctor's appointments, therapy sessions, home modifications, IEP meetings, diaper changes, special diets, lots of broken objects or the juggling of schedules and complex needs. What's most painful and difficult to handle is the social isolation, the loss of togetherness opportunities, friendships and even of relatives.  It's the unspoken heartbreak of families like ours who are, for one reason or another, suddenly on the fringe.  It's our secret sorrow because we know we made choices - which we would make again - and we must live with their consequences, however unforeseen or devastating they might be.

To those of you who are sticking it out with the five of us or who have newly welcomed us into your life since 2011, thank you will never be enough.

IAC Results 343, 344, 345

The following referrals were issued in IAC Session 343 which was held on January 7, 2016:

1) US dossier from July 2013 referred a female child aged 1 year and 11 months with features in health status

2) French dossier from December 2015 referred a male child aged 1 year and 8 months with a family history and features in health status

3) Belgian dossier from December 2015 referred a waiting child (#3049) with a profile on the MOJ site

4)  US dossier from December 2015 referred a waiting child (#2579) with a profile on the MOJ site

5)  US dossier from December 2015 referred a waiting child (#3008) with a profile on the MOJ site

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The following referrals were issued in IAC Session 344 which was held on January 14, 2016:

1) Spanish dossier from February 2011 referred a female child aged 1 year and 8 months

2) German dossier from March 2011 referred a male child aged 1 year and 10 months

3) German dossier from November 2011 referred a male child aged 2 years and 9 months with features in health status

4) French dossier from June 2012 referred a male child aged 2 years and 7 months with features in health status and a family history

5) Italian dossier from February 2013 referred a female child aged 3 years and 5 months with features in health status

6) Italian dossier from March 2013 referred a female child aged 1 years and 10 months with features in health status

7) Luxembourg dossier from April 2013 referred three children, two male and one female, aged 3 years with a family history

8) US dossier from December 2014 referred a male child aged 3 years and 9 months with features in health status and a family history

9)  US dossier from January 2015 referred a waiting child (#2890) with a profile on the MOJ site

10) US dossier from January 2015 referred a waiting child (#2199) with a profile on the MOJ site

11)  French dossier from January 2015 referred three waiting children (#2849 & #2850 & #2851) with profiles on the MOJ site

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The following referrals were issued in IAC Session 345 which was held on January 21, 2016:

1) Swedish dossier from February 2013 referred a male child aged 2 years with a family history

2) Italian dossier from July 2013 referred a female child aged 2 years and 9 months with features in health status

3) US dossier from November 2015 referred biological brothers and sister, ages 5 years and 7 months, 8 years & 2 years and 9 months

4) German dossier from November 2015 referred a male child aged 1 year and 7 months with features in health status and a family history

5) Spanish dossier from January 2016 referred a male child aged 11 years and 1 month

6) US dossier from January 2015 referred a waiting child (#2779) with a profile on the MOJ site

7) US dossier from January 2015 referred two waiting children (#2727 & #2728) with profiles on the MOJ site

8) US dossier from January 2015 referred a waiting child (#2691) with a profile on the MOJ site

Best Friends' Reunion

The day we met Ella in May 2014, she told us, "I have a best friend named Lilit and I want you to meet her."  The next morning, we had the opportunity to do so and it was immediately obvious to us that these two girls were very close.  We knew that their friendship would likely be Ella's biggest emotional loss caused by our adoption.  By the time we picked up Ella in October 2014, Lilit had been transferred to an older child orphanage where they would probably have gone together had we not found Ella in time.

Over the next year and a half, as Ella learned English and was able to share more about her life in Armenia, she continually spoke to us of Lilit, of her love for her, her worry about her health, the day they were separated, and the experiences they had together.  Ella requested we place Lilit's picture on the wall beside her bed and even wondered if Lilit could become her sister via adoption.

In January 2016, Lilit arrived in New York to receive life-saving surgery as well as a chance to reunite with her best friend.  Over Presidents' Day weekend, our family traveled to Manhattan to spend a few days with Lilit.  We knew that it would be an emotional time for the girls and that Lilit's state of recovery as well as Ella's loss of the Armenian language would complicate their reunion, but we also felt that it was important for both of them to reconnect.

Over the long weekend, the girls played together, did crafts, shared meals, scared nurses, handed out Valentines, took side by side naps, looked at photos and videos of their years in Gyumri, and spent lots of time beautifying themselves.  Lilit also confirmed many stories that Ella had told us.

The girls are shockingly alike in their preferences and many personality traits and solidly bound by six years shared in an orphanage.  We hope that from now on, they will be allowed to maintain contact, regardless of what the future holds for them, because the past and the deep connection that they have in common can never be forgotten or diminished.

Leap Day

Happy Leap Day, everyone.  The girls' school is doing a silly outfit day, so we had a lot of fun this morning.

Ella chose this wacky combo:

And Emilia wanted a dress, so we took the rare opportunity to have her wear her Austrian Dirndl.  It's actually a very beautiful, rich purple, but showing up as blue here in the photo.

Leap Day Sisters: