About a month ago, I reached out to the Bulgarian adoption community, seeking advice about the possibility of a birth family search. There were so many holes in Emilia's story which, if possible, Craig and I wanted to fill in sooner rather than later, so that we could share the information with Emilia as appropriate during her years of growing up.
Some families recommended a searcher in Sofia, so we contracted with him to find Emilia's birth family. Less than three weeks later, yesterday, we received several photos, a video, names, dates, and a lot of additional details about Emilia's history. Part of it is heartbreaking and will be difficult to explain to Emilia many years from now; other aspects of her story speak of great love paired with painful loss.
There was joy in Emilia's birth relatives' eyes at the sight of her in photos and at the knowledge that she is treasured as our daughter. For me, it's amazing to recognize my sweet girl in the faces and bodies of her birth family. Now I know where she got her left stick-out ear, her big feet, the gorgeous tone of her skin and hair, and her beautiful eyes. I have a better understanding of her family medical history which will be so valuable for Emilia in the future. Most importantly, now I can be confident I am right when, each night, I whisper into Emilia's ear that she's loved in two mamas' hearts.
Saturday, May 18, 2013
Friday, May 17, 2013
IAC 250 & 251 & 252 Results
The following results were issued in IAC Session 250 which was held on March 28, 2013:
1) Canadian dossier from January 2010 referred a female child aged 1 year and 9 months with features in health status
2) French dossier from March 2010 referred a female child aged 2 years and 7 months with features in health status
3) Canadian dossier from March 2010 referred two children, male and female, aged 5 years & 1 month and 6 years and 1 month
4) German dossier from April 2010 referred a male child aged 2 years and 6 months with features in health status
5) US dossier from September 2010 referred a male child aged 2 years and 2 months with features in health status and a family history
6) French dossier from November 2010 referred a male child aged 2 years and 5 months with features in health status
7) German dossier from December 2010 referred a female child aged 3 years and 11 months with features in health status and a family history
8) Italian dossier from December 2010 referred a female child aged 1 year and 9 months with a family history
9) French dossier from February 2011 referred a female child aged 3 years and 8 months with a family history
10) French dossier from April 2011 referred a male child aged 1 year and 11 months with a family history
11) US dossier from March 2012 referred three children, male and female, aged 6 years & 5 months, 5 years & 5, and 3 years & 10 months
12) French dossier from October 2012 referred a waiting child (#2068) with a profile on the MOJ site
13) US dossier from March 2013 referred a waiting child (#1737) with a profile on the MOJ site
14) Canadian dossier from 2013 referred the child of the husband
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The following referrals were issused in IAC Session 251 which was held on April 4, 2013:
1) Greek dossier from July 2009 referred a male child aged 3 years and 9 months
2) Spanish dossier from February 2010 referred a female child aged 1 year and 4 months
3) German dossier from February 2010 referred a female child aged 2 years and 5 months with features in health status
4) French dossier from February 2010 referred a male child aged 2 years and 3 months
5) French dossier from March 2010 referred a male child aged 5 years and 11 months with features in health status
6) German dossier from April 2010 referred a male child aged 2 years and 11 months with features in health status
7) French dossier from May 2010 referred a female child aged 8 years and 4 months
8) German dossier from October 2010 referred a male child aged 2 years and 8 months with features in health status
9) German dossier from February 2011 referred a female child aged 4 years and 2 months with features in health status
10) Italian dossier from November 2011 referred a female child aged 8 years and 2 months
11) Dutch dossier from March 2012 referred a female child aged 1 year and 11 months with features in health status
12) Italian dossier from October 2012 referred three children, male and female, aged 8 years & 3 months, 7 years and 1 month, and 6 years and 1 month
13) US dossier from December 2012 referred a male child, aged 2 years and 2 months, with features in health status and a family history
14) Italian dossier from December 2012 referred a female child aged 9 years and 4 months with features in health status
15) US dossier from December 2012 referred a male child aged 1 year and 9 months with a family history
16) Italian dossier from December 2012 referred a female child aged 8 years and 11 months
17) Italian dossier from March 2013 referred a waiting child (#1777) with a profile on the MOJ site
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The following referrals were issued in IAC Session 252 which was held on April 11, 2013:
1) US dossier from October 2009 referred a female child aged 10 years
2) Spanish dossier from October 2009 referred a male child aged 5 years and 11 months
3) Spanish dossier from January 2010 referred a male child aged 1 year and 10 months
4) Spanish dossier from February 2010 referred a male child aged 3 years and 10 months with features in health status
5) Spanish dossier from February 2010 referred a female child aged 3 years and 2 months
6) Norwegian dossier from March 2010 referred a male child aged 3 years and 1 month
7) Dutch dossier from March 2010 referred a male child aged 5 years and 2 months
8) French dossier from December 2010 referred a male child aged 4 years and 8 months with a family history
9) Italian dossier from January 2012 referred a brother and sister, aged 7 years and 8 years & 8 months
10) US dossier from August 2012 referred a female child aged 9 years and 9 months
11) Italian dossier from March 2013 referred a brother and sister, aged 6 years and 9 years & 2 months
12) Italian dossier from March 2013 referred a brother and sister, aged 10 years & 2 months and 6 years & 3 months
13) US dossier from April 2013 referred two waiting children (#1936 & #2136) with profiles on the MOJ site
14) Italian dossier from April 2013 referred two waiting children (#1814 & #1815) with profiles on the MOJ site
15) US dossier from April 2013 referred two waiting children (#1697 & #1083) with profiles on the MOJ site
16) US dossier from April 2013 referred two waiting children (#1791 & #1356) with profiles on the MOJ site
1) Canadian dossier from January 2010 referred a female child aged 1 year and 9 months with features in health status
2) French dossier from March 2010 referred a female child aged 2 years and 7 months with features in health status
3) Canadian dossier from March 2010 referred two children, male and female, aged 5 years & 1 month and 6 years and 1 month
4) German dossier from April 2010 referred a male child aged 2 years and 6 months with features in health status
5) US dossier from September 2010 referred a male child aged 2 years and 2 months with features in health status and a family history
6) French dossier from November 2010 referred a male child aged 2 years and 5 months with features in health status
7) German dossier from December 2010 referred a female child aged 3 years and 11 months with features in health status and a family history
8) Italian dossier from December 2010 referred a female child aged 1 year and 9 months with a family history
9) French dossier from February 2011 referred a female child aged 3 years and 8 months with a family history
10) French dossier from April 2011 referred a male child aged 1 year and 11 months with a family history
11) US dossier from March 2012 referred three children, male and female, aged 6 years & 5 months, 5 years & 5, and 3 years & 10 months
12) French dossier from October 2012 referred a waiting child (#2068) with a profile on the MOJ site
13) US dossier from March 2013 referred a waiting child (#1737) with a profile on the MOJ site
14) Canadian dossier from 2013 referred the child of the husband
---------------------------------------------------------------------
The following referrals were issused in IAC Session 251 which was held on April 4, 2013:
1) Greek dossier from July 2009 referred a male child aged 3 years and 9 months
2) Spanish dossier from February 2010 referred a female child aged 1 year and 4 months
3) German dossier from February 2010 referred a female child aged 2 years and 5 months with features in health status
4) French dossier from February 2010 referred a male child aged 2 years and 3 months
5) French dossier from March 2010 referred a male child aged 5 years and 11 months with features in health status
6) German dossier from April 2010 referred a male child aged 2 years and 11 months with features in health status
7) French dossier from May 2010 referred a female child aged 8 years and 4 months
8) German dossier from October 2010 referred a male child aged 2 years and 8 months with features in health status
9) German dossier from February 2011 referred a female child aged 4 years and 2 months with features in health status
10) Italian dossier from November 2011 referred a female child aged 8 years and 2 months
11) Dutch dossier from March 2012 referred a female child aged 1 year and 11 months with features in health status
12) Italian dossier from October 2012 referred three children, male and female, aged 8 years & 3 months, 7 years and 1 month, and 6 years and 1 month
13) US dossier from December 2012 referred a male child, aged 2 years and 2 months, with features in health status and a family history
14) Italian dossier from December 2012 referred a female child aged 9 years and 4 months with features in health status
15) US dossier from December 2012 referred a male child aged 1 year and 9 months with a family history
16) Italian dossier from December 2012 referred a female child aged 8 years and 11 months
17) Italian dossier from March 2013 referred a waiting child (#1777) with a profile on the MOJ site
------------------------------------------------------------------------
The following referrals were issued in IAC Session 252 which was held on April 11, 2013:
1) US dossier from October 2009 referred a female child aged 10 years
2) Spanish dossier from October 2009 referred a male child aged 5 years and 11 months
3) Spanish dossier from January 2010 referred a male child aged 1 year and 10 months
4) Spanish dossier from February 2010 referred a male child aged 3 years and 10 months with features in health status
5) Spanish dossier from February 2010 referred a female child aged 3 years and 2 months
6) Norwegian dossier from March 2010 referred a male child aged 3 years and 1 month
7) Dutch dossier from March 2010 referred a male child aged 5 years and 2 months
8) French dossier from December 2010 referred a male child aged 4 years and 8 months with a family history
9) Italian dossier from January 2012 referred a brother and sister, aged 7 years and 8 years & 8 months
10) US dossier from August 2012 referred a female child aged 9 years and 9 months
11) Italian dossier from March 2013 referred a brother and sister, aged 6 years and 9 years & 2 months
12) Italian dossier from March 2013 referred a brother and sister, aged 10 years & 2 months and 6 years & 3 months
13) US dossier from April 2013 referred two waiting children (#1936 & #2136) with profiles on the MOJ site
14) Italian dossier from April 2013 referred two waiting children (#1814 & #1815) with profiles on the MOJ site
15) US dossier from April 2013 referred two waiting children (#1697 & #1083) with profiles on the MOJ site
16) US dossier from April 2013 referred two waiting children (#1791 & #1356) with profiles on the MOJ site
Sunday, May 12, 2013
Mother's Day 2013
Even though it is Mother's Day, my day was not much different from any ordinary Sunday. It started out with my being woken up by Rex who was crawling all over me at 6:00 am when I'd had six hours of sleep, looking me into the one eye I had so painstakingly peeled open to greet him, and then deciding I was not what he wanted.
My day was filled with the routine work of mothers: laundry, vacuuming, kissing boo-boos, cleaning, preparing meals, etc. For dinner I made a favorite soup, potage crecy. I've altered the recipe to be dairy free, using olive oil instead of butter and omitting the cream. I also add a few tablespoons of parsley and mash rather than puree before serving. It was such a nice Mother's Day gift that everyone enjoyed this soup for dinner, so there was no short order cooking required.
I also made some freezer meals for Emilia.
And I sorted through the piles of clothes that the kids have outgrown. Some will be donated, others will be passed on to friends. This large box is going to our Ms. Rie and her sweet little boy.
Craig gifted me with his time and talents today by completing a few jobs on the honey do list and as well as by taking care of tasks that I hadn't asked him to do. There's no surprise like opening the door to a spotless microwave, for example. Craig also hung this painting we bought from a street artist in Yerevan... just a shade under two years for that project to be completed.
Maybe the truth of Mother's Day is that, just like any day, it's not really about me, but about the ones who made me a mother, the treasures entrusted to my care, the little beings who make mothering simultaneously so challenging and so rewarding.
Happy Mother's Day to all mothers: bio moms, foster moms, birth moms, step moms, adoptive moms, moms-in-law, moms to be, waiting moms...
Happy Mother's Day to some of you who have been especially in my thoughts today: Beth, Marriya, Mary, Jenni, Molly, and Cherie. I am so lucky to know moms like you.
O the mother's joys!
The watching, the endurance, the precious love, the anguish,
the
patiently yielded life.
Walt Whitman
Thursday, May 9, 2013
100,000
Sometime overnight my blog passed 100,000 views which is a little mind-boggling to me. I know I have 81 followers, but there must be many more people who stop by here occasionally. Thank you for following our journey as it unfolds one day at a time.
Now, I have a burning question and I promised myself I would ask it once I'd had 100,000 hits: lifeisgood, who are you? Do we know each other? You always leave the nicest, most encouraging comments. I'd just like to know you.
*lifeisgood has revealed her identity. It is someone I have known for a while, but that I never would have guessed.
Now, I have a burning question and I promised myself I would ask it once I'd had 100,000 hits: lifeisgood, who are you? Do we know each other? You always leave the nicest, most encouraging comments. I'd just like to know you.
*lifeisgood has revealed her identity. It is someone I have known for a while, but that I never would have guessed.
Monday, May 6, 2013
The Little Things
Well,
it’s Monday and it’s been rainy here in our neck of the woods. On a day like this, it’s the little things
that keep you going. Here’s some of what
made me happy today.
Emilia
was playing with her doll this afternoon, calling it baby and letting it dance
and jump. Then she suddenly placed the
doll’s head against her shoulder and patted its back. She kept it there for quite a while and gave
it a tight hug. This is the first time I
have ever seen her express affection toward her doll like this and my heart
skipped a beat when I realized that Emilia was holding and comforting the doll
in the same way I do with her. It was so
wonderful to witness her engaging in rudimentary pretend and social play. Made this mama beam.
Since
Monday is salad night at our house and Rex doesn’t go for much roughage, I made
him a grilled cheese sandwich instead. I
decided to put about two tablespoons of pureed yellow squash between the slices
of bread along with the rice cheese of the same color. I was hoping Rex would still eat the sandwich
even with a hidden vegetable component and he did. Hurray.
Emilia
had the first part of her preschool evaluation today and she did so well. She showed off many of her skills and was
interactive with the people from the school district. I was very proud of the way she handled
herself in the unknown environment with total strangers. I was less than pleased, however, with what
our district offers for preschool, so the chances that we will be sending Emilia
there in the fall are slim to none.
However, I still would like to access therapies for her through the
district, so the evaluations will continue next week.
During
the preschool evaluation, I learned that because of when Emilia’s birthday is
we will have a choice to let her start kindergarten at age 5 or age 6. For me, that’s a no-brainer. Of course, we will start our tiny girl at age 6. This
gives us two more years from this fall until we even need to worry about any
formal schooling which makes me very happy.
By then we should have a much better idea about whether she can handle a
conventional school setting or will be homeschooled.
One
of Rex’s therapists had been out on sick leave for the last two months. She was very close to Rex at the time she
left and today was her first day back in the classroom. When Rex saw her in the hallway this morning,
he instantly smiled his widest from ear to ear, jumped up and down excitedly,
and then took Ms. Kyrie’s hand to walk with her. Of course, Craig and I couldn’t be more
thrilled that Rex remembered and recognized his teacher after an absence of two
months and that he was able to show his affection for her in such appropriate and
adorable ways.
You know what, for
a Monday, this wasn’t a bad day at all. And why should it be when I have such blessings as these in my life?
Sunday, May 5, 2013
Orthodox Easter 2013
Happy Easter to the people of Armenia and Bulgaria and everyone else who celebrates this holiday today according to the calendar of the Orthodox Catholic Church.
We were fortunate enough to be invited again to enjoy the afternoon with our local Bulgarian community. As always, they rented a lodge and brought on the food and fun.
The potluck dinner was delicious and plentiful, consisting of traditional Bulgarian Easter dishes like lamb, rice, banitsa, lots of salads and sides, and kozunak.
I contributed hummus and tortilla chips (Rex loves that as a snack) and homemade lemon cupcakes. I told Craig after so many months of GFDF baking, I wanted to concoct something utterly unhealthy and delectable, full of butter, sugar and wheat flour. So I started with a lemon cake mix, but used butter instead of oil and milk and freshly squeezed lemon juice instead of water which made for some rich cupcakes. The butter cream was prepared from scratch per my family recipe and I added lemon oil for flavor. And then I mixed freshly grated lemon zest with sanding sugar to sprinkle on top. That said, I will never be a good cake decorator because I lack all kinds of patience and don't enjoy it nearly as much as I do the baking.
Fortunately, there's lots of papery help from the store to make cupcakes look scrumptious.
We were so excited to meet our friends, the Van Roekels, at the Easter celebration again. Their son Nikolas and Emilia were at the same orphanage together, so we are happy to keep their connection alive. We were so impressed with how much progress both of these little ones have made in the last year. Nikolas was very protective of and interested in Emilia today. She also enjoyed his company, but wasn't quite as committed to the relationship. Maybe she was thinking, "You're a super cool dude, but I have to keep my options open, okay?" Here they are playing:
As always, we felt so warmly welcomed by our local Bulgarian community and enjoyed the food, the dancing and music, the Easter egg hunt, and the company. Nikolas even performed some Bulgarian songs with the other kids and Emilia danced along. Wish the weather could have been better, but the wee Martinis were not deterred by the rain:
Our kids did great and lasted three hours at this very loud, very busy celebration, but on the way home, the peanut gallery was quiet:
I think an early bedtime might be in the cards tonight.
We were fortunate enough to be invited again to enjoy the afternoon with our local Bulgarian community. As always, they rented a lodge and brought on the food and fun.
The potluck dinner was delicious and plentiful, consisting of traditional Bulgarian Easter dishes like lamb, rice, banitsa, lots of salads and sides, and kozunak.
 |
| Kozunatzi - more and more of them arrived later |
Fortunately, there's lots of papery help from the store to make cupcakes look scrumptious.
We were so excited to meet our friends, the Van Roekels, at the Easter celebration again. Their son Nikolas and Emilia were at the same orphanage together, so we are happy to keep their connection alive. We were so impressed with how much progress both of these little ones have made in the last year. Nikolas was very protective of and interested in Emilia today. She also enjoyed his company, but wasn't quite as committed to the relationship. Maybe she was thinking, "You're a super cool dude, but I have to keep my options open, okay?" Here they are playing:
As always, we felt so warmly welcomed by our local Bulgarian community and enjoyed the food, the dancing and music, the Easter egg hunt, and the company. Nikolas even performed some Bulgarian songs with the other kids and Emilia danced along. Wish the weather could have been better, but the wee Martinis were not deterred by the rain:
Our kids did great and lasted three hours at this very loud, very busy celebration, but on the way home, the peanut gallery was quiet:
I think an early bedtime might be in the cards tonight.
Friday, May 3, 2013
It's Crunch Time
Last night, the girl that would not even allow any solids near her mouth a little over a year ago, pushed a chair up to the kitchen island, reached for the bag of tortilla chips, grabbed a few and then:
Hallelujah!
Hallelujah!
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